NOT the normal, evaday, daytime adventure, of course. Not like today, when I sprinted, panther-like, all the way up a tree and leapt, ninja-like, onto the roof, and then meowed, pitiful-like, until the neighbors called Teh Authorities. Then, while Mrs. Whatsername crawled out a tiny dormer window wif an open can of tuna – I hopped back down the tree and on to the patio, skillfully knocking over potted herbs while I searched for a comfy spot to take a baff…until I remembered that I had, earlier that day, cut a hole in the kitchen screen window with my delicate little claw and so was able to saunter back inside and ask, very polite-like, for teh can of tuna.
So, like I said, no. Nothing so mundane as that. Time now for some real excitement.
Because tonight, for some reason, I am locked inside. There is sloppy, heavy-handed slab of duct tape where my intricately-cut screen hole used to be . But that’s okay, because I have a new adventure. Right now, I’m on the bed, all snuggled in tight, ready for a Beguiling Beddy-bye Story from the Reigning Monarch of REM Sleep – The Emerald-Eyed Empress of Snooze-ville –
(for those of you unawares – Suzie is the cat who has lived upstairs ever since I came to live here. She is an Ancient Tuxedo Kitteh – 13 entire years old, and Classy, as well as Wise. While she may not look like much other than a Penguin impersonating a Bowling Pin – she does, in fact, have an Amazing Superpower. Suzie can sleep All. Day. Long. I’ve clocked her at 23 3/4 hours, at a stretch, which must be some kind of record. Also, she can put everyone else to sleep. She’s like an Insomnia Atom Bomb. Mrs. W. has tried to read the same paragraph in a book for YEARS, but with Suzie in her face, purring in her full-0n Hypno-Kitteh style, sending her off to La-La Land to ride the Good Ship Somni-Pop…the book just falls on her face and That is That).
Suzie, a regular Voyager to Slumber City, is renowned for giving the most excellent Nocturnal Tours of the Snoozy Subconscious.
So! Suzie! Wifout further ado – what IS tonight’s Exciting Adventure?
oh – my. this is gonna be good.
fanks to TadNPeanuts for this amazing and thought-provoking video. Mom, why AM I sushi? I’ll be finking about this for a while…