Kittehs! here is a cautionary tale. gather round yer teenage girl humans and get them to pay heed (how to get them to pay heed is yer problem, but this is a very important Public Service Announcement for Comely Frauleins Everywhere!). Muschi, der Deutchlander kitteh, is abouts to save teh day.
Hans: Fraulein! Ich Liebe dich!
Gretel: oh Hans! is it true? do you really?
Hans: Ja! Ja! would I lie to my little Spatzchen? Come, Liebling, let’s make a picnic with your wonderful schnitzel and go discuss our love behind the hay stacks. leave the cat. mein Hund, Fritz, will protect her.
Muschi (whispering in her ear): not so fast, mein mådchen. i just saw him throwing back a stein in the biergarten wif teh burgermeister’s daughter. smell his breathes. foooeey! that’s a whole lotta Heinken! it’s not even lunch time! also, Fritz there? he just ate the coo-coo from the clock and barfed it up in the umbrella stand. I fink you knows what you needs to do.
Gretel (closing the door on Hans and Fritz): oh, Muschi, what would I ever do without you?
Muschi: don know. but bring me teh schnitzel and mebbe you won’t have to find out.