I has so many talents, as you know, but in my off hours, in between being a Par Kour Ninja, a Super Sleuth, Huntress, Historian and Raconteur, I am, at heart, a Poet. Listen:
Me! Feed Me! Me FIRST!
Rocket fuel pit stop, got 2 go
chase squirrels. kthnxbye.
A Haiku, of course. Critics may quibble and claim that “SQUIRREL” not one syllable, but they clearly speak so slowly that the damn rodent is just going to get away. Also, I could write longer poems if I wanted to, but I’m kinda busy. As the following haiku poignantly explains:
I have things to do,
Woman. Seriously. Hey!
Open the Damn Door.
But these rascals beat me to it. I can only sigh and admit they’re pretty good. I can also pee on the book, but as a Professional Poet, I think there are union rules against that. So instead, enjoy the following contributions to Caterature (not to be confused with Cliterature, which is really not nice at all).
Someday soon, I’m sure all us Kitteh Bards will be an Oxford Anthology and lionized (finally!) by the Literati, who eva they are . Oh, word to the wise, fellow word-smiths – the term for a Group of Distinguished Cat Poets is NOT Cliterati, as I was led to believe. fyi.